Views from the corner

May 5, 2008

15 Mind blowing surgery statements

Filed under: phrases — Tags: , , , — marley howards @ 1:31 pm

Hospitals are places each soul has been to from birth, to sickness and even near death. These institutions are made for people to have a one stop shop for their health needs like pediatrics, E-E-N-T’s, surgeons, and gynecologists to coroners. It is a place where all kinds of sickness meet and gather like a big prom party in a junior high.

It is a place where people experience happenings for the first time like from the first baby to the second baby making seminar to the nth checkup. We develop a relationship with the people working there including the guards and nurses because it is important that you be in good terms with them to lessen the worries and problems that you will encounter soon. Hey! You are in their territory and you can’t get angry because you will need them! We can’t sometimes help but meet people who are not that experienced to handle our situations, ever more if, you do not know any doctor from the hospital or clinic that you went to.

Below are some funny lines that you wouldn’t want to hear from your doctor while undergoing Surgery, I dare you to get angry!

1. What the heck is that!?

That phrase will surely put you into shock faster than anything else you’ve ever known!

2. Does this hurt? How about this? Your kidding!? I hit it with a hammer!

What could be worst thing than anesthesia? Hitting you with a hammer and not feeling it!

3. Of course this is ethical.

Makes you ponder about mercy killing.

4. Has anyone seen my ring?

What could be worst than Mr. Bean dropping M&M’s inside the patients internal organs then finding and returning a bullet he removed?

5. Christ, better get out of the book!

Prayers do work. But this calls for an immediate action!

6. Wait a minute! That is not her gallbladder!?

Then, what the hell did you eradicate?

7. Boy! I have not done this in a long long time!

In basketball terms, substitute please!!!

8. We have to hurry; my flight will be in 30 minutes!

Then get the *toot* out of here!

9. I don’t understand, this didn’t happen in the video.

Don’t worry…I know what to do…I saw this on ER once…

10. See! It is rusted! That is why I hate operating here in this hospital.

Help! Save me from these rusty-murderers!

11. Yikes! Oh well, there is a first time for everything. Charge it to experience.

What!? And charge my credit card for that?

12. I had a bad feeling about this case. But, good thing, the tarot card reader made me feel good.

Did she say if this was going to be successful with you operating me?

13. It is alright to proceed. He’s asleep.

Uhm, Doc, I can’t speak up and I can still hear you loud and clear!

14. We had been looking at your X-ray and we can’t figure out if it’s the left or the right.

Go back to nursery and have them teach you the song “I have two hands!”

Last but not the least,

15. Hi everybody! I’m doctor nick!

-from The Simpsons

I just hope that you will hear from the doctors in TV shows only. In case, Good luck to you if you experience any of these phrases that you wouldn’t want your doctor to say!


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