Views from the corner

May 1, 2008

4 ways to avoid the boomerang kids syndrome

Filed under: family, relationships — Tags: , , — marley howards @ 6:53 am

This post was inspired or to be perfectly honest, by 1 a.m. unannounced visit by my friend since college.  She had a fight with her mom and dad.  She “brought” a friend for dinner and her mom didn’t like that he didn’t eat lobster without any hints that he has an allergy to any seafood, discovered or not.

She’s the same as my age, which I won’t divulge anymore.  Bottomline, we’re both enough to get even a 48 square meter apartment where we can barely move, but at least we’re on our own.  She went solo for two years after college but moved back in when she resigned from her first job.  I agreed that time that moving back in with her folks was the best thing because she did that time for she was out of cash and of anything to last her for a month.

Boomerang kids are those who go back home after college instead of living away from their folks.  Nothing wrong actually, most parents want to see their kids home but after a few months so, it can get annoying in some ways.

But it has been almost 2 years as well since she has been staying with them.  She got a new job a year ago but still stuck there. Her reason, she can save more because she doesn’t have to pay rent.  I somewhat pity her but then she’s right.  But there comes a time we have to spread our wings and fly by ourselves.

So, how do we evade from this dilemma? Here are some ways I did and a few friends of mine did as well:

1. Save from your first day in college

May see old-school but it works, financial shows compute how much we can save if we set aside $10 a day or a $100 dollars a month.  But it really pays to save.

2.  Tag a close friend to stay and share rent with you

You can at least half of the total rent by getting a flatmate. But remember, you’ve got to trust them enough to stay with them.

3.  Initially get a cheaper, yet cozy place

You don’t have to get a grand place on your first time being your own.  A less costly, yet secure enough apartment is a good choice as your first nest, so to speak.

4.  Get a good paying job

Yes, I know this is one of those things that are easier said than done, but then again, if you want to be on your own, get a job that can pay for rent, at least.

Back to my dear, old friend.  In her rage, she swore that sometimes she’d rather be one of those homeless person rather than live with her parents.  In my concern, I blurted out that just move out and both of them are to blame.  The consequences of her partying in college instead of saving up led the way to this.  Thank God, she didn’t get angry with me and actually agreed.  There are a lot of personal reasons why some go back home after college. Some want to lay low after years of hardwork, while some just want to stay close and take care of their parents.  I, for one crave for someone to do my laundry, to be served with hearty meals during dinner and have someone to go home to after a grueling day at work.  But, we have to be independent one way or another.


1 Comment »

  1. My kids chose to move away as soon as they hit college, and I accepted that decision. We’d be happy to welcome them back anytime, and we would still be the doting parents. But like you said, most want to be independent, and I accept that.

    Comment by travelnooks — May 1, 2008 @ 9:30 am

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